1 00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:06,439 Nowhere in man's history does he display more tenacity, 2 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:09,943 more perseverance, than in his search for eternal youth. 3 00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:14,531 Halting the relentless process of aging has been a constant dream of man's... 4 00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:16,367 and woman's. 5 00:01:34,260 --> 00:01:38,806 Hecate... 6 00:01:47,815 --> 00:01:49,816 Eternal youth... Is it really a dream, 7 00:01:49,817 --> 00:01:52,862 or is it possible that somewhere someone found the secret? 8 00:01:54,655 --> 00:01:56,781 The following experience gave me a new attitude... 9 00:01:56,782 --> 00:01:59,285 on the whole subject of youth and aging. 10 00:02:06,375 --> 00:02:08,752 September 20, 8:05 p.m. 11 00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:10,629 William Cubby, age 22, 12 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:15,592 deeply concerned with retaining his youthful vigor, his trim physique. 13 00:02:15,593 --> 00:02:19,554 This concern had made him a dedicated jogger. 14 00:02:19,555 --> 00:02:21,973 Cubby would never know if the jogging really helped. 15 00:02:21,974 --> 00:02:24,101 He was the first in a series of Chicagoans... 16 00:02:24,143 --> 00:02:28,272 who were spared the ordeal of seeing their youth slip away, slowly. 17 00:04:29,810 --> 00:04:35,190 See what can happen with all this emphasis on staying young? Poor old fool. 18 00:04:35,191 --> 00:04:38,318 What's so unusual about a man of 90 having a heart attack and dying? 19 00:04:38,319 --> 00:04:40,737 He was jogging. Jogging! 20 00:04:40,738 --> 00:04:43,406 I'll be happy if I can bend down and tie my shoelaces when I'm 90. 21 00:04:43,407 --> 00:04:46,451 If you take better care of yourself, with the proper food and exercise, 22 00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:49,663 you should be able to do everything at 90 that you could do at 19. 23 00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:54,269 - Good morning, everyone. - Good morning, Mr. Vincenzo. 24 00:04:54,293 --> 00:04:56,545 - What a lovely morning today. - Yeah. 25 00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:02,425 You notice anything different about me today? Anything different? 26 00:05:02,426 --> 00:05:05,179 - Different? - Yes. 27 00:05:09,141 --> 00:05:11,184 I lost five pounds. 28 00:05:11,185 --> 00:05:15,231 Exercise, yoga 45 minutes a day, and I skip breakfast. 29 00:05:21,237 --> 00:05:24,907 - Have we run out of things to do around here? - No. 30 00:05:27,243 --> 00:05:30,119 You are working on the swinging singles update, Carl, right? 31 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:32,664 - Yeah, yeah, that's right. - What have you come up with so far? 32 00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:36,543 Uh, listen, there have been a lot of changes in the last 10 years in the dating scene. 33 00:05:36,544 --> 00:05:38,711 That was the reason for the update. 34 00:05:38,712 --> 00:05:40,088 You will have it on my desk by Friday, won't you? 35 00:05:40,089 --> 00:05:42,298 - Friday. Right. - Fine. 36 00:05:42,299 --> 00:05:44,009 Uh, that's just a rough draft. 37 00:05:46,595 --> 00:05:50,515 Tony, I've got here... 38 00:05:50,516 --> 00:05:54,811 a very nice French, caramel-covered doughnut. 39 00:05:54,812 --> 00:05:58,147 You can have it for breakfast. I won't tell anybody. 40 00:05:58,148 --> 00:06:02,319 This fellow would have never reached 90 eating stuff like that. 41 00:06:02,361 --> 00:06:05,196 - Yeah, but look what he died from... exercise. - Carl... 42 00:06:05,197 --> 00:06:07,699 Now, Tony, that is a rough draft. You understand? 43 00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,576 - I understand. - I'm just blocking it out... 44 00:06:09,577 --> 00:06:12,078 I'm just gonna glance at it. That's all. 45 00:06:12,079 --> 00:06:14,415 Well, it's, uh... It's very rough. 46 00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:17,710 What's that? 47 00:06:19,753 --> 00:06:23,757 - That's for colds and flu. - What's the other one? 48 00:06:26,844 --> 00:06:28,512 - That's vitamin "E." - What's that for? 49 00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:36,603 You know, Tony, there was something very peculiar about that old jogger. 50 00:06:36,604 --> 00:06:39,689 This is quite good, Carl. I will get the rest of it on Friday? 51 00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:43,443 He was jogging along the River Road... - Carl, forget about that fella. 52 00:06:43,444 --> 00:06:46,280 Nobody cares about 90-year-old people! 53 00:06:50,159 --> 00:06:53,536 Tony... - Carl, this is a youth-orientated culture. 54 00:06:53,537 --> 00:06:56,247 Their music, clothing styles, language... 55 00:06:56,248 --> 00:06:59,250 That's where it is news-wise at this point in time. 56 00:06:59,251 --> 00:07:02,629 But that body had no I.D. on it. 57 00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:04,672 I mean, it had no social security. 58 00:07:04,673 --> 00:07:07,050 It had no Medicaid, Medicare. It had nothing. 59 00:07:07,051 --> 00:07:11,971 Carl, look, last week on the Johnny Carson show, they had an Indian, 110 years old. 60 00:07:11,972 --> 00:07:17,226 He wore this feathered war bonnet, and he was doing push-ups, and it was dull. 61 00:07:17,227 --> 00:07:19,354 - I get the point, Tony. I get the point. - I hope so. 62 00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:22,398 It's, uh... It's just that... 63 00:07:22,399 --> 00:07:25,526 along that particular strip along the River Road... 64 00:07:25,527 --> 00:07:29,864 means that that old jogger had to run for four miles. 65 00:07:29,865 --> 00:07:32,116 I mean, a 90-year-old man. 66 00:07:32,117 --> 00:07:35,036 If he had drove to River Road, they'd have found his car by now. 67 00:07:35,037 --> 00:07:38,164 And if somebody dropped him off down there, 68 00:07:38,165 --> 00:07:40,485 whoever it was would've come down to claim the body by now. 69 00:07:41,877 --> 00:07:44,712 But you're right, Tony. Who cares? Nobody cares. 70 00:07:44,713 --> 00:07:48,800 New York wants that swinging singles feature. 71 00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:53,554 It wants it light, perceptive, full of insight and by Friday! 72 00:07:53,555 --> 00:07:56,600 Right, right, right. I get it, Tony. Right. 73 00:07:57,977 --> 00:07:59,979 Ca... 74 00:08:03,357 --> 00:08:05,400 The most conservative newspaper in Chicago... 75 00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:08,069 has a classified column headed "Social Clubs." 76 00:08:08,070 --> 00:08:11,656 The ads offer computer matching, astrological mating, 77 00:08:11,657 --> 00:08:14,617 but it all boils down to a simple need. 78 00:08:14,618 --> 00:08:17,036 You want a girl, right? 79 00:08:17,037 --> 00:08:20,915 No, not exactly. What I really wanna know is how it all works. 80 00:08:20,916 --> 00:08:24,961 - I find you the girl of your dreams is how it works. - And then what happens? 81 00:08:24,962 --> 00:08:30,425 Magic, love, maybe even friendship. 82 00:08:30,426 --> 00:08:34,262 Uh, here, take one of these cards and fill it out, and we'll get started. 83 00:08:34,263 --> 00:08:36,264 Uh-huh. Well, can I think about it? 84 00:08:36,265 --> 00:08:40,059 - What's to think about? - Oh, now, don't be nervous. 85 00:08:40,060 --> 00:08:42,687 Why, I take care of everything. 86 00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:45,023 Now, uh, generally, 87 00:08:45,024 --> 00:08:49,861 you meet the girl right here, usually... come and sit down... 88 00:08:49,862 --> 00:08:54,491 Usually with her relatives, and we have a nice cup of tea. 89 00:08:54,533 --> 00:08:56,993 - Come and sit down. - Yeah, all right, all right. 90 00:08:56,994 --> 00:09:00,705 And it's very informal. 91 00:09:00,706 --> 00:09:03,374 Um, is there something you wanted to tell me? 92 00:09:03,375 --> 00:09:05,585 - Uh... - Something you're ashamed of? 93 00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:08,379 No. You see, I'm a newspaper reporter. 94 00:09:08,380 --> 00:09:11,507 Well, that's not so bad. I'll find you a girl anyway. 95 00:09:11,508 --> 00:09:13,885 No, I don't want a girl. See, I'm looking for an angle... 96 00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:15,762 for a story I'm writing on the singles scene. 97 00:09:15,763 --> 00:09:18,014 You mean you're wasting my time for nothing? 98 00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:21,768 I chose you because I think you've got the whole picture. I mean, the whole schmear. 99 00:09:21,769 --> 00:09:24,937 Besides that, I've got a very tough editor, and I've got a very short deadline. 100 00:09:24,938 --> 00:09:27,482 - Are you married? - Me? No. No. 101 00:09:27,483 --> 00:09:30,943 - What's your biggest competitor? - Oh, singles apartments, 102 00:09:30,944 --> 00:09:34,906 - singles bars, computer matching. - Oh? 103 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:37,950 - Have you ever been married? - No. Never, never, never. 104 00:09:37,951 --> 00:09:41,245 Uh-huh. Computer matching. I thought that went out with love beads. 105 00:09:41,246 --> 00:09:44,665 Well, I watched a lot of them fold up, but there's still a few left. 106 00:09:44,666 --> 00:09:46,793 - What's the biggest one? - Max Match. 107 00:09:46,794 --> 00:09:49,212 - Max... - Oh, these people. 108 00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:53,424 They're only concerned about youth and physical beauty. 109 00:09:53,425 --> 00:09:57,553 - Egomaniacs trying to hook up with each other. - Yeah. 110 00:09:57,554 --> 00:10:01,474 I mean, charm, steady work, sincerity... 111 00:10:01,475 --> 00:10:03,893 These things don't count for anything. 112 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:08,106 - Uh, you have a good job? - Yeah, it's all right. 113 00:10:08,107 --> 00:10:10,900 - What are your hobbies? - None. I'm too busy. I work all the time. 114 00:10:10,901 --> 00:10:13,444 Oh, good. That means you're ambitious. 115 00:10:13,445 --> 00:10:17,532 - Oh, I've got a lot of nice girls for you to meet. - What? 116 00:10:17,533 --> 00:10:20,243 What are you doing there? What do you got? 117 00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:22,245 No, Bella. You got the wrong idea. 118 00:10:22,246 --> 00:10:24,205 No, I'm... I'm not in the market for a wife. 119 00:10:24,206 --> 00:10:26,457 Me, married? That's ridiculous. 120 00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:28,751 No, thanks. Thanks a lot, Bella, but I've gotta go to work. 121 00:10:28,752 --> 00:10:31,587 Oh, good. Business does come first. 122 00:10:31,588 --> 00:10:36,092 - Don't worry. I'll be in touch. - Yeah. 123 00:10:36,093 --> 00:10:38,845 Newspaperman. 124 00:10:38,846 --> 00:10:41,223 Author. 125 00:11:06,206 --> 00:11:09,251 JJ 126 00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:22,555 September 21, 8:13 p.m. Cynthia Tibbs, 127 00:11:22,556 --> 00:11:24,849 young and beautiful and determined to stay that way, 128 00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:28,227 was performing her nightly exercise. 129 00:11:28,228 --> 00:11:32,357 Cynthia's concern over aging was more real than she would ever know. 130 00:12:22,449 --> 00:12:25,076 September 22, 10:00 a.m. 131 00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:27,828 I had spent the night hitting singles bars, 132 00:12:27,829 --> 00:12:30,915 hearing all about biorhythms, Harvey Wallbangers, 133 00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:34,669 rugby, tuned exhausts and, of course, sex. 134 00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:37,129 I got enough to write that part of my feature. 135 00:12:37,130 --> 00:12:39,340 Singles apartments were up for the next day, 136 00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:44,553 and I found they came in all sizes in varying degrees of exclusivity. 137 00:12:44,554 --> 00:12:46,390 I decided to start at the top. 138 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,864 This way. 139 00:14:30,243 --> 00:14:32,495 - May I have that, please? - Oh, yes, of course. 140 00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:34,849 - I was just looking for someone in authority to give it to. - Mmm. Thank you. 141 00:14:34,873 --> 00:14:37,333 - What did the medical examiner say? - May I ask who you are? 142 00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:40,336 Yes, of course. See, Kolchak, I.N.S. 143 00:14:40,337 --> 00:14:43,631 - You're Kolchak? - Yeah, that's right. 144 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:47,259 You're the one the precinct captains are always talking about? 145 00:14:47,260 --> 00:14:49,178 - What do they say? - That you're a pinwheel. 146 00:14:49,179 --> 00:14:51,013 That's because those idiots don't know... 147 00:14:51,014 --> 00:14:53,654 I don't accept other people's judgments. I make my own evaluations. 148 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:58,646 Are you sure that you work on the Chicago Police Department... 149 00:14:58,647 --> 00:15:00,875 and not for some independent agency I don't know anything about? 150 00:15:00,899 --> 00:15:03,526 Uh, Chicago P.D., Sergeant Orkin. 151 00:15:03,527 --> 00:15:05,945 I like to think I understand the value of the news media. 152 00:15:05,946 --> 00:15:07,946 I feel the police and press should work in concert. 153 00:15:10,700 --> 00:15:13,870 - Where you been all my life? - In Edgewood, out in the boonies. 154 00:15:13,912 --> 00:15:16,414 My first case is a hundred-year-old Jane Doe, 155 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,958 in a singles playground, dressed in a body stocking. 156 00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:24,839 Uh-huh. Why would she wear a ring that was so loose it falls off her finger? 157 00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:28,717 When my grandmother hit 80, she insisted on wearing her stockings over her shoes. 158 00:15:28,718 --> 00:15:30,344 Sometimes they get that way. 159 00:15:30,345 --> 00:15:32,305 - They do, huh? - Yeah. 160 00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:39,812 - Miss Tibbs? - Just a minute. 161 00:15:39,813 --> 00:15:42,314 Take a look around the bedroom. What's the party's name? 162 00:15:42,315 --> 00:15:45,151 Cynthia Tibbs, a professional convention hostess. 163 00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:47,736 - Beautiful girl. - Is she at work now? 164 00:15:47,737 --> 00:15:50,739 - I guess, or she's sleeping out these days. - Uh-huh. 165 00:15:50,740 --> 00:15:53,576 She went away and just left this sliding door wide open? 166 00:15:53,577 --> 00:15:56,287 Why not? Who's gonna rob her up here on the third floor? 167 00:15:56,288 --> 00:15:58,664 - Besides, this is a security building. - Uh-huh. 168 00:15:58,665 --> 00:16:01,375 Miss Tibbs mention anything to you about having a relative staying? 169 00:16:01,376 --> 00:16:03,878 - Mother, grandmother, aunt? - No, no. 170 00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:07,882 - No sign of an older woman's clothes and no suitcases. - What's this doing on? 171 00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:11,177 She probably left that on so people would think someone was home. 172 00:16:11,178 --> 00:16:13,220 I do the same thing, in case of robbery. 173 00:16:13,221 --> 00:16:15,014 I thought this was a security building. 174 00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:18,225 This is the last apartment. I don't know how the old girl got where she got, 175 00:16:18,226 --> 00:16:20,729 but she didn't take a gainer off one of these balconies. 176 00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:33,115 - Has anybody been in to identify him? - Nope. 177 00:16:33,116 --> 00:16:35,701 - What about the old lady they brought in today? - Are you kidding? 178 00:16:35,702 --> 00:16:38,496 Read the coroner's report. Puts them both at about 100 years old. 179 00:16:38,497 --> 00:16:39,456 Yeah. 180 00:16:39,457 --> 00:16:42,208 Nobody comes in to identify people that age. 181 00:16:42,209 --> 00:16:47,421 You know, he must have lived a rich, full life to have hung on to such a ripe old age. 182 00:16:47,422 --> 00:16:51,467 Mmm. Yeah. It says on here the cause of death was heart failure. 183 00:16:51,468 --> 00:16:54,929 - What about the old lady? - Same. Do you mind if I lower the sheet? 184 00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:57,306 - My arms are getting tired. - Wait. There's a mark on his finger. 185 00:16:57,307 --> 00:17:00,351 - It looks like a ring mark. - Do you got the ring? 186 00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:03,395 It may be in the personal belongings box. 187 00:17:03,396 --> 00:17:06,690 - Personal belongings box. - Uh-huh. 188 00:17:06,691 --> 00:17:10,152 Uh-huh. "11684." 189 00:17:10,153 --> 00:17:13,989 - Uh, how much, Gordy? - Not this time. 190 00:17:13,990 --> 00:17:16,325 You're always down in the morgue asking special favors. 191 00:17:16,326 --> 00:17:18,786 - No, I always pay. - You promise money, but you never come through. 192 00:17:18,787 --> 00:17:20,913 No, you got me mixed up with somebody else. 193 00:17:20,914 --> 00:17:22,915 - How about five bucks? - Nope. 194 00:17:22,916 --> 00:17:25,793 We morgue attendants are always getting burned by you. 195 00:17:25,794 --> 00:17:29,588 We talked it over, and we want a portable TV for when things are slow. 196 00:17:29,589 --> 00:17:32,424 - Color. - A color television set? 197 00:17:32,425 --> 00:17:34,760 Are you out of your mind? I don't have that kind of money. 198 00:17:34,761 --> 00:17:37,972 By the way, that glass peeper belongs to the old man. 199 00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:40,015 Why wasn't it in the autopsy report? 200 00:17:40,016 --> 00:17:43,519 The pathologists don't bother doing full workups with real old people. 201 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:45,854 I mean, everything's wrong with them. 202 00:17:45,855 --> 00:17:47,815 It goes in the belongings box. 203 00:17:47,816 --> 00:17:50,484 Listen, Gordy, I've got to get in that box. 204 00:17:50,485 --> 00:17:52,861 Come on. You know I can't afford a television set. 205 00:17:52,862 --> 00:17:55,489 Aw, how much can it cost ya? 206 00:17:55,490 --> 00:17:59,618 - Well, black and white? - Color. 207 00:17:59,619 --> 00:18:02,955 - Black and white. - Eighteen-inch screen? 208 00:18:02,956 --> 00:18:05,958 - Used. - It's a deal. 209 00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:07,918 - All right. - That's the glass eye. 210 00:18:07,919 --> 00:18:11,422 Glass eye. Right. Okay. 211 00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:14,050 - Jogging trousers. - Shoes. 212 00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:17,469 - Shoes. - He had big feet, huh? 213 00:18:17,470 --> 00:18:20,723 - This is his jacket. Down here... - What's this? 214 00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:22,766 - A key. - Uh-huh. 215 00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:25,061 Where's the ring? There's no ring in here. Where is it? 216 00:18:25,103 --> 00:18:27,646 Well, either he wasn't wearing it when he died, or it fell off. 217 00:18:27,647 --> 00:18:29,982 No one here took it. Nothing gets you fired so fast. 218 00:18:29,983 --> 00:18:32,067 Yeah, all right. Concerning your television set... 219 00:18:32,068 --> 00:18:34,361 - Please, please, no threats. - N... 220 00:18:34,362 --> 00:18:36,822 We made a deal, and I let you look in the box. 221 00:18:36,823 --> 00:18:39,491 - Is it my fault if the ring isn't in there? - Well, uh... 222 00:18:39,492 --> 00:18:44,455 - Now, I think the TV'll go right there. - Uh-huh. 223 00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:47,666 And if I'm not watching Let's Make a Deal by the end of next week, 224 00:18:47,667 --> 00:18:49,918 there'll be no more deals down here. 225 00:18:49,919 --> 00:18:55,674 Yes, sir. If Monty Hall can't liven this place up, there's no hope. 226 00:18:55,675 --> 00:18:57,469 Thanks a lot, Gordy. 227 00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:33,004 You there, there's no parking along this stretch of the road. 228 00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:39,635 - What do you got there? What do you got there? - Huh? Oh. Uh... 229 00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:41,388 A four-leaf clover. 230 00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:11,667 Yes? 231 00:20:11,668 --> 00:20:13,461 Send him in. 232 00:20:22,595 --> 00:20:24,681 Come in. 233 00:20:26,015 --> 00:20:28,183 Well, this is nice, really. 234 00:20:28,184 --> 00:20:30,519 It's comfortable for me. 235 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:34,481 - May I call you Lance? - Sure. That'd be terrific. 236 00:20:34,482 --> 00:20:38,444 - The computer was right. You're charming. - Yeah. 237 00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:40,447 Sit down. 238 00:20:44,951 --> 00:20:48,203 Max Match is very exclusive in itself, Lance, 239 00:20:48,204 --> 00:20:52,166 but within the general membership there are superior people. 240 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,793 Truly superior in every respect. 241 00:20:54,794 --> 00:20:58,547 - The computer picks them out. It picked you. 242 00:20:58,548 --> 00:21:02,968 This means that you will be matched with the most beautiful people in Chicago. 243 00:21:02,969 --> 00:21:05,804 - You will be a member of the Olympians. - Is it expensive? 244 00:21:05,805 --> 00:21:07,806 No, there's no charge. 245 00:21:07,807 --> 00:21:10,350 It's an indulgence of mine. 246 00:21:10,351 --> 00:21:14,688 You see, beauty and youth are the most important things in the world to me. 247 00:21:14,689 --> 00:21:17,483 I have to ask you a question. It's very important. 248 00:21:17,484 --> 00:21:19,319 Was everything on your application truthful? 249 00:21:20,862 --> 00:21:22,988 I mean, do you have any physical imperfections? 250 00:21:22,989 --> 00:21:27,159 - No, none at all. - But there is something. 251 00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:32,039 Well, my name really isn't Lance Mervin. I changed it legally. 252 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:36,543 Well, that doesn't matter. The name you picked suits you very well. 253 00:21:36,544 --> 00:21:39,963 - Thank you. - This makes you an Olympian. 254 00:21:39,964 --> 00:21:42,050 Congratulations. 255 00:21:47,347 --> 00:21:52,017 Now all the gods and goddesses will know who you are. 256 00:21:52,018 --> 00:21:53,895 And this scroll makes it official. 257 00:21:56,064 --> 00:21:59,484 - When does the action start? - Oh, tonight. 258 00:22:01,569 --> 00:22:04,696 Well, I don't like what you're doing, Irvin. 259 00:22:04,697 --> 00:22:06,782 Mother, can't you call me Lance? 260 00:22:06,783 --> 00:22:09,618 No. You were Irvin when I was in labor. 261 00:22:09,619 --> 00:22:11,620 You were Irvin when I fed you with my breast. 262 00:22:11,621 --> 00:22:14,748 - You'll always be Irvin for me. - I know. 263 00:22:14,749 --> 00:22:17,918 What kind of a name is Lance for a cost accountant? 264 00:22:17,919 --> 00:22:20,546 That's the idea. I'm trying to get my identity crisis together. 265 00:22:20,547 --> 00:22:23,007 - What? - I want to change my image. 266 00:22:24,509 --> 00:22:27,427 I don't understand that. 267 00:22:27,428 --> 00:22:29,888 And I don't understand you using a machine either... 268 00:22:29,889 --> 00:22:33,433 to pick some person you could spend your whole life with. 269 00:22:33,434 --> 00:22:35,478 Are you listening to me? 270 00:22:36,771 --> 00:22:38,857 Or maybe you're thinking just of tonight. 271 00:22:40,650 --> 00:22:43,152 I'd like to see the kind of girl you asked for. 272 00:22:44,821 --> 00:22:47,823 I asked for a girl just like you. 273 00:22:47,824 --> 00:22:49,659 Wash your hands. 274 00:22:53,538 --> 00:22:55,831 Mmm. 275 00:22:55,832 --> 00:22:59,042 Some kind of lady you're meeting in those short pants, Irvin. 276 00:22:59,043 --> 00:23:01,336 These are tennis shorts. 277 00:23:01,337 --> 00:23:05,132 - It's what you wear on a tennis date. - Mm-hmm. 278 00:23:05,133 --> 00:23:07,135 Call me Lance. 279 00:23:08,177 --> 00:23:11,555 Don't be out late, Irvin! 280 00:23:11,556 --> 00:23:12,473 The key I had pilfered... 281 00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:16,101 was stamped with the number 118 "E." 282 00:23:16,102 --> 00:23:19,062 "E" what? It took some footwork on my part, 283 00:23:19,063 --> 00:23:23,067 but I found a building on Akron Street that matched the number. 284 00:23:29,949 --> 00:23:32,076 Wrong floor. I'm downstairs. 285 00:24:14,577 --> 00:24:16,579 Hello? 286 00:24:17,330 --> 00:24:19,957 Hello? 287 00:24:19,958 --> 00:24:21,751 Hello! 288 00:24:27,423 --> 00:24:29,467 Anybody home? 289 00:24:44,691 --> 00:24:46,609 Phew. 290 00:24:57,996 --> 00:25:02,458 "William Cubby. Max Match Corporation." 291 00:25:06,379 --> 00:25:08,464 The occupant's name was William Cubby, 292 00:25:08,506 --> 00:25:12,342 and whatever he was now, he had been considered a very special single... 293 00:25:12,343 --> 00:25:15,679 by Max Match just a few days ago. 294 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,472 The scroll welcomed him into the inner circle... 295 00:25:17,473 --> 00:25:20,976 of the super-beautiful... The perfect people. 296 00:25:20,977 --> 00:25:24,480 But perhaps Cubby wasn't perfect. 297 00:25:41,831 --> 00:25:43,833 Oh. 298 00:25:56,804 --> 00:25:59,806 Indeed, it seemed that William Cubby wasn't perfect at all. 299 00:25:59,807 --> 00:26:05,103 And Irvin, a.k.a. Lance? He would never again be concerned about his image. 300 00:26:05,104 --> 00:26:06,522 His mother was right. 301 00:26:06,564 --> 00:26:09,817 Lance's appointment had indeed been with a different kind of lady. 302 00:27:38,072 --> 00:27:42,367 Yeah, that's right. And, of course, I thought about you immediately... 303 00:27:42,368 --> 00:27:45,620 About what you said about wanting to work in concert with the press, with me. 304 00:27:45,621 --> 00:27:48,498 - I said that? - Yeah. Well, here's our opportunity. 305 00:27:48,499 --> 00:27:51,459 You can provide me with the proof that I need. 306 00:27:51,460 --> 00:27:53,504 Uh, proof... 307 00:27:55,298 --> 00:27:58,133 Proof a hundred-year-old jogger is actually... 308 00:27:58,134 --> 00:28:00,844 a 22-year-old stereo salesman named William Cubby... 309 00:28:00,845 --> 00:28:03,096 That the two men are one and the same? 310 00:28:03,097 --> 00:28:05,974 - Yeah, that's right. I know what you're thinking. - Uh-huh. 311 00:28:05,975 --> 00:28:07,934 You're thinking, why should I supply him with proof? 312 00:28:07,935 --> 00:28:10,729 - What's in it for me, right? - Right. 313 00:28:10,730 --> 00:28:12,898 Why did you transfer here from Wedgewood? 314 00:28:12,899 --> 00:28:15,942 - Edgewood. - Right. Why did you make the move? 315 00:28:15,943 --> 00:28:19,905 It was for excitement and thrills and advancement, right? 316 00:28:19,906 --> 00:28:24,367 Okay, now picture this. Picture yourself walking right into your captain's office, 317 00:28:24,368 --> 00:28:27,663 and you tell him that you got this case licked... 318 00:28:27,705 --> 00:28:29,956 That all these old people, who are embarrassing... 319 00:28:29,957 --> 00:28:33,001 everybody in the department... everybody else... by dropping dead all over the place... 320 00:28:33,002 --> 00:28:35,545 aren't really old people after all. 321 00:28:35,546 --> 00:28:40,634 They're really a bunch of virile, supple swingers! 322 00:28:40,635 --> 00:28:42,886 - You are a pinwheel. - What? 323 00:28:42,887 --> 00:28:46,473 When I came back that first day and told the captain you weren't such a bad guy, 324 00:28:46,474 --> 00:28:49,351 he almost busted a gut, finally had to go to the men's room. 325 00:28:49,352 --> 00:28:52,063 Look here. They stuck this in my coffee mug. 326 00:28:55,483 --> 00:28:58,069 "A pinwheel for a pinhead." 327 00:28:59,946 --> 00:29:01,488 Well, I wouldn't pay any attention to that. 328 00:29:01,489 --> 00:29:04,032 They're always kidding, those guys. 329 00:29:04,033 --> 00:29:09,371 Now, the old man in the morgue had a glass eye... blue... and so did William Cubby. 330 00:29:09,372 --> 00:29:11,707 It was marked right down on his driver's license. 331 00:29:11,749 --> 00:29:14,961 Here it is. Here it is. There's the spare blue eye. See? 332 00:29:16,420 --> 00:29:19,798 - Our case rests on a glass eye? - Yeah. Yeah, that's right. 333 00:29:19,799 --> 00:29:22,736 It kept nagging me. You see, something was wrong with the driver's license. 334 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,720 And sure enough, there it was... artificial eye. 335 00:29:24,762 --> 00:29:26,805 Let me get this straight. 336 00:29:26,806 --> 00:29:30,392 You want me to go to the captain and tell him I've licked the case with a glass eye? 337 00:29:30,393 --> 00:29:32,644 People aging a lifetime overnight? 338 00:29:32,645 --> 00:29:37,899 Oh, no. You see, the door key that was found on the old man fit Cubby's apartment. 339 00:29:37,900 --> 00:29:39,735 Now, what you have to do is you have to see... 340 00:29:39,777 --> 00:29:42,028 if Cubby ever had his fingerprints taken. 341 00:29:42,029 --> 00:29:44,906 Then you take those fingerprints, you go down to the lab, 342 00:29:44,907 --> 00:29:47,761 and you lift the prints off the old man down there and compare the two of them. 343 00:29:47,785 --> 00:29:50,036 And if you do, that's our proof! 344 00:29:50,037 --> 00:29:52,622 That's all the proof that I need... you need... we need. 345 00:29:52,623 --> 00:29:57,669 I can just see the print boys' faces when I tell them why I want the work. 346 00:29:57,670 --> 00:30:01,214 Hey, what key the old man had? How'd you get this? 347 00:30:01,215 --> 00:30:03,466 Did you take personal belongings out of the morgue? 348 00:30:03,467 --> 00:30:07,512 - Would I do a thing like that? - You robbed our Cook County Morgue? 349 00:30:07,513 --> 00:30:09,931 Well, Sergeant, you know, it isn't a shrine. 350 00:30:09,932 --> 00:30:12,017 - It's just a morgue. - Get out. 351 00:30:12,018 --> 00:30:14,227 - There was an... - I said, get out. 352 00:30:14,228 --> 00:30:16,855 But I thought we were gonna work in concert together. 353 00:30:16,856 --> 00:30:21,484 Concert. When I start waving my baton, it'll be over your head. 354 00:30:21,485 --> 00:30:25,656 - Well, if that's the way you feel about it. - Here. And take this with you. 355 00:30:38,961 --> 00:30:41,588 How about it? Have you seen Cynthia Tibbs? 356 00:30:41,589 --> 00:30:44,800 Nothing. Like I told you police before, that's her lifestyle. 357 00:30:44,842 --> 00:30:47,052 You know, in and out, come and go. 358 00:30:47,053 --> 00:30:48,887 She's probably here in the building, in another apartment. 359 00:30:48,888 --> 00:30:51,139 For two whole days? 360 00:30:51,140 --> 00:30:52,891 I guess you haven't been single for a few years. 361 00:30:52,892 --> 00:30:54,935 I was never that single. 362 00:31:00,733 --> 00:31:02,942 What's that, some kind of clue? 363 00:31:02,943 --> 00:31:05,987 "This is to certify Cynthia Tibbs has been selected by the Max Match Corporation." 364 00:31:05,988 --> 00:31:11,534 Looks like she was some kind of a member of, uh, some kind of a society... 365 00:31:11,535 --> 00:31:13,871 at the Max Match Corporation. 366 00:31:29,970 --> 00:31:32,014 Uh, miss? 367 00:31:34,100 --> 00:31:36,684 - Would you fill these out, please? - Sure. 368 00:31:36,685 --> 00:31:38,729 Uh, miss, could I have... 369 00:31:40,606 --> 00:31:44,109 Hey, what's all this medical background? Scars and operations? 370 00:31:44,110 --> 00:31:46,736 - They really get personal. - That's the idea. It makes it exclusive. 371 00:31:46,737 --> 00:31:50,657 - I like it that way. - Under partner preference, I'm gonna put down... 372 00:31:50,658 --> 00:31:53,284 vegetarian, Sagittarius, on the cusp. 373 00:31:53,285 --> 00:31:55,286 - What do you think? - I'll take any chick... 374 00:31:55,287 --> 00:31:58,415 who's on a macrobiotic diet, who's into Tantric yoga. 375 00:31:58,416 --> 00:32:02,002 What ever happened to the girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad? 376 00:32:04,505 --> 00:32:06,674 It's a song. 377 00:32:08,092 --> 00:32:10,469 Miss... - Would you follow me, please? 378 00:32:15,933 --> 00:32:17,892 Right this way. 379 00:32:17,893 --> 00:32:19,978 Are you being helped? 380 00:32:19,979 --> 00:32:22,188 No, and, uh, I'm being ignored. 381 00:32:22,189 --> 00:32:24,732 - I'd like to know why. - What can I do for you? 382 00:32:24,733 --> 00:32:27,360 I would think the first thing I do is fill out one of those application forms. 383 00:32:27,361 --> 00:32:29,362 I'm sorry, but... 384 00:32:29,363 --> 00:32:31,157 Linda, I'll see the gentleman. 385 00:32:35,953 --> 00:32:38,872 Wowee! Looks like a boudoir. 386 00:32:38,873 --> 00:32:41,124 I'm sorry. I think there's been a misunderstanding. 387 00:32:41,125 --> 00:32:44,085 - You see, we only accept people under 30. - Uh-huh. 388 00:32:44,086 --> 00:32:46,212 Is that for your general membership, or is that restricted... 389 00:32:46,213 --> 00:32:49,008 to the special group that you call the Olympians? 390 00:32:53,137 --> 00:32:55,555 Now, why would an attractive man like you be here? 391 00:32:55,556 --> 00:32:58,808 - I wanna be an Olympian. - You don't need us. 392 00:32:58,809 --> 00:33:02,020 You're very male. You have the confidence to dress as you like, 393 00:33:02,021 --> 00:33:05,482 and, I suspect, do as you like with everything, Mr... 394 00:33:05,483 --> 00:33:07,484 - Kolak. Yeah. - Kolak. 395 00:33:07,485 --> 00:33:09,736 Boy, this is really some office. 396 00:33:09,737 --> 00:33:11,946 You should see the joint that I have to work in. 397 00:33:11,947 --> 00:33:14,365 - What do you do, Mr. Kolak? - I'm a writer. 398 00:33:14,366 --> 00:33:17,577 You know, I've never seen painted furniture like that before in an office. 399 00:33:17,578 --> 00:33:19,662 It's just terrific. You got more of it back there? 400 00:33:19,663 --> 00:33:21,789 - Uh, our computer's back there. - Oh. 401 00:33:21,790 --> 00:33:24,792 - It's not very aesthetic. - Yeah. Yeah. 402 00:33:24,793 --> 00:33:26,753 You use a camera in your writing? 403 00:33:26,754 --> 00:33:28,963 No. No, it's just a hobby of mine. No. 404 00:33:28,964 --> 00:33:31,382 That's all. And half the time, the darn thing doesn't even work. 405 00:33:31,383 --> 00:33:33,384 - Whoops! There she goes again. - See, it's just... 406 00:33:33,385 --> 00:33:35,970 What kind of writing do you do? Short stories or novels? 407 00:33:35,971 --> 00:33:38,681 Uh, yeah, both. Yeah. 408 00:33:38,682 --> 00:33:41,226 I'm an avid reader. Any titles I might recognize? 409 00:33:41,227 --> 00:33:43,770 No. No, I don't think so. 410 00:33:43,771 --> 00:33:45,981 I don't have much of a readership here in the States. 411 00:33:46,023 --> 00:33:49,192 My publisher thinks my stories are much too bizarre. Like the one I wrote... 412 00:33:49,193 --> 00:33:51,736 about young people who were being turned into crones in a minute. 413 00:33:51,737 --> 00:33:55,114 - Just like that, they're dead. - It's unusual, at any rate. 414 00:33:55,115 --> 00:33:58,826 You've got an unusual job here. How'd you get this kind of a job? 415 00:33:58,827 --> 00:34:00,954 - It was a fluke. - I love flukes! 416 00:34:00,955 --> 00:34:02,956 I've written some of my best stories about flukes. 417 00:34:02,957 --> 00:34:06,000 I hate to be rude, but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to go. 418 00:34:06,001 --> 00:34:08,545 For some reason, around this time of day, I get very tired. 419 00:34:08,546 --> 00:34:10,672 Yeah, but... - Nice talking to you, Mr. Kolak. 420 00:34:10,673 --> 00:34:12,674 Yeah, yeah, but you haven't told me about the Olympians. 421 00:34:12,675 --> 00:34:14,385 Maybe next ti... 422 00:34:23,060 --> 00:34:24,811 After my enlightening conversation... 423 00:34:24,812 --> 00:34:26,521 with the beautiful Helen Surtees, 424 00:34:26,522 --> 00:34:29,607 I ran a check through tax records and business licenses. 425 00:34:29,608 --> 00:34:32,986 The Max Match dating service was almost brand-spanking new. 426 00:34:32,987 --> 00:34:36,155 No one knew where it came from or what other branches it had. 427 00:34:36,156 --> 00:34:38,658 It seemed to me that such mysterious origins... 428 00:34:38,659 --> 00:34:42,621 warranted what we in the press call “the midnight interview. "" 429 00:35:35,257 --> 00:35:38,177 Hecate... 430 00:37:44,511 --> 00:37:45,928 Rene Michele, first-grade teacher, 431 00:37:45,929 --> 00:37:47,513 was anticipating an exciting evening... 432 00:37:47,514 --> 00:37:49,932 arranged for her by the Max Match Corporation. 433 00:37:49,933 --> 00:37:54,228 But her kids had worn her out that day, making her feel older than her 23 years. 434 00:37:54,229 --> 00:37:57,191 Rene had opted for a nap before getting dressed. 435 00:37:58,692 --> 00:38:00,693 Rene never heard her alarm. 436 00:38:00,694 --> 00:38:02,488 She never awoke from her nap. 437 00:38:04,114 --> 00:38:07,367 The next day, Rene's class would have a substitute teacher. 438 00:38:30,182 --> 00:38:35,186 I don't get it. Your hunch was right about it being Greek, but it's ancient Greek... 439 00:38:35,187 --> 00:38:37,980 A prayer for a sacrifice to Hecate, the goddess of youth. 440 00:38:37,981 --> 00:38:40,900 - What kind of a sacrifice? - What kind of sacrifice? 441 00:38:40,901 --> 00:38:43,778 All that mattered was that they be physically perfect. 442 00:38:43,779 --> 00:38:46,614 Oh. So this Hecate had pretty high standards, right? 443 00:38:46,615 --> 00:38:48,825 All the Greek gods were easily offended. 444 00:38:48,826 --> 00:38:52,287 Everything had to be absolutely perfect, just right. 445 00:38:52,329 --> 00:38:54,497 As if it came out of a computer, right? 446 00:38:54,498 --> 00:38:57,500 I think this is the sacrificer right here. Here. 447 00:38:57,501 --> 00:38:59,877 The most beautiful woman in the world. 448 00:38:59,878 --> 00:39:03,840 The face that launched a thousand ships. Helen of Troy. 449 00:39:03,841 --> 00:39:08,135 That's Helen Surtees. She runs the Mix Match... Max Match computer company. 450 00:39:08,136 --> 00:39:10,388 - What are you talking about? - Yeah. 451 00:39:10,389 --> 00:39:13,224 She resembles every statue of Helen I've ever seen. 452 00:39:13,225 --> 00:39:15,726 I'd give everything to get next to that. 453 00:39:15,727 --> 00:39:17,937 I think that's the deal... Everything. 454 00:39:17,938 --> 00:39:21,732 You know, every time I talk about the classics, 455 00:39:21,733 --> 00:39:24,735 I wish I was back in college teaching again. 456 00:39:24,736 --> 00:39:27,196 But there were all those beautiful girl students. 457 00:39:27,197 --> 00:39:29,907 I could never keep my head on straight. 458 00:39:29,908 --> 00:39:33,536 Well, anyway, Helen was half mortal. 459 00:39:33,537 --> 00:39:36,163 She was a demigoddess, and she'd made a deal with Hecate. 460 00:39:36,164 --> 00:39:38,624 The Randolph, please. 461 00:39:38,625 --> 00:39:40,710 No, I'm sorry, Jack. This cab's taken. 462 00:39:40,711 --> 00:39:44,088 No hurry. I got a hangover that could kill a buffalo. 463 00:39:44,089 --> 00:39:46,966 - Conventions are murder. - Yeah, I can tell, yeah. 464 00:39:46,967 --> 00:39:50,511 Helen's deal with Hecate was for eternal youth, right? 465 00:39:50,512 --> 00:39:54,056 - That's the story. - Hey, you got her number? 466 00:39:54,057 --> 00:39:56,642 I wound up with a real bowwow last night. 467 00:39:56,643 --> 00:39:59,020 You are referring to my sister! 468 00:39:59,021 --> 00:40:02,023 Oh, I can see she's a lovely lady. 469 00:40:02,024 --> 00:40:04,108 Suppose something went wrong with the sacrifices. What happened? 470 00:40:04,109 --> 00:40:07,153 The wrath of the gods. 471 00:40:07,154 --> 00:40:09,447 A shepherd once put up a sick lamb for a sacrifice to Diana. 472 00:40:09,448 --> 00:40:10,573 Yeah? 473 00:40:10,574 --> 00:40:12,992 - She turned him to stone. - Stone? 474 00:40:12,993 --> 00:40:15,912 - That's right. - Stoned? Who's getting stoned? Who's this Diana? 475 00:40:15,913 --> 00:40:19,249 Listen, can't you let me in on any of this action, huh? 476 00:40:22,044 --> 00:40:26,213 Kaz, were the sacrifices to Hecate prepared in any special way? 477 00:40:26,214 --> 00:40:28,674 No. Nothing elaborate. 478 00:40:28,675 --> 00:40:32,678 They were always marked with some kind of medallion or ornamentation of some kind. 479 00:40:32,679 --> 00:40:35,514 - Ornamentation? You mean like a ring? - Sure. 480 00:40:35,515 --> 00:40:40,561 Look, when I said I'm in no hurry, I didn't mean we should spend the day here. 481 00:40:40,562 --> 00:40:42,481 Hey, why don't you take another cab? 482 00:40:43,982 --> 00:40:47,693 Who do you think you're talking to, cabbie? 483 00:40:47,694 --> 00:40:50,405 I am the president of my own feed company. 484 00:40:50,447 --> 00:40:52,949 I flew here first class. 485 00:40:52,950 --> 00:40:57,411 I'm staying at the Randolph, the biggest hotel in the world. 486 00:40:57,412 --> 00:40:59,664 Twenty-four hundred rooms. 487 00:40:59,665 --> 00:41:03,793 Hey, sport, you are not staying at the biggest hotel in the world. 488 00:41:03,794 --> 00:41:07,421 The Hotel Rossiya in Moscow has 3,200 rooms, 489 00:41:07,422 --> 00:41:09,716 and your hotel's nothing. 490 00:41:12,427 --> 00:41:16,347 Who counts Communists? 491 00:41:16,348 --> 00:41:19,809 - All right. Come on, Kaz. Let's get this thing off, huh? - Yeah. 492 00:41:19,810 --> 00:41:23,938 - Mayonnaise? - It's an old Greek remedy. 493 00:41:23,939 --> 00:41:26,440 - Nothing greasier under the sun. - Mayonnaise? 494 00:41:26,441 --> 00:41:29,235 Yeah. I had a kid get his head stuck out... 495 00:41:29,236 --> 00:41:32,071 in that iron-rail fence of mine out front there. 496 00:41:32,072 --> 00:41:34,991 Stuck a little mayonnaise on his cheeks, and he popped right out of there. 497 00:41:34,992 --> 00:41:39,830 Yeah. Will somebody answer the telephone, please? Ron, are you so busy? 498 00:41:41,873 --> 00:41:45,626 - It's for you. It's for you. - Huh? Excuse me, Kaz. 499 00:41:45,627 --> 00:41:49,130 Hello? 500 00:41:49,131 --> 00:41:50,965 Hello, Mr. Kolchak. 501 00:41:50,966 --> 00:41:53,676 - Bella Sarkof. - And how are you tonight? 502 00:41:53,677 --> 00:41:56,471 - I'm very busy. - And I'm not? 503 00:41:56,513 --> 00:41:58,973 I've been working like a beaver to find you a girl. 504 00:41:58,974 --> 00:42:01,934 Her name is Natalie Kravarik, 505 00:42:01,935 --> 00:42:05,312 a dental assistant, 38 years young. 506 00:42:05,313 --> 00:42:10,693 Bella... Bella, I don't want a girl. I don't need your services. 507 00:42:10,694 --> 00:42:14,697 - Well, good night, Carl. - You don't need my services. 508 00:42:14,698 --> 00:42:16,699 Robert Redford you are, all of a sudden? 509 00:42:16,700 --> 00:42:19,827 - Good night, Emily. - Emily? Who's Emily? 510 00:42:19,828 --> 00:42:22,621 - Good night, Mr. Vincenzo. - Don't worry, Bella! 511 00:42:22,622 --> 00:42:24,915 - Good night, Miss Emily. - I've got somebody else for you! 512 00:42:24,916 --> 00:42:28,002 He's a police sergeant, unmarried and young. 513 00:42:28,003 --> 00:42:31,672 Oh, hey, that's a find. A wonderful mate. 514 00:42:31,673 --> 00:42:34,508 - They're eligible for pensions. - Good night, Mr. Vincenzo. 515 00:42:34,509 --> 00:42:37,762 Yeah. Yeah, his name is Sergeant Orkin. 516 00:42:37,763 --> 00:42:39,889 You can call him at the 12th Precinct. 517 00:42:39,890 --> 00:42:42,892 He's lonely, new in town, and he's just right for Natalie. 518 00:42:42,893 --> 00:42:45,061 You're telling me my job already? 519 00:42:45,062 --> 00:42:47,688 If not Natalie, maybe someone else. 520 00:42:47,689 --> 00:42:51,484 Oh, when I get hold of one like him, I sink my teeth in, 521 00:42:51,485 --> 00:42:54,695 and I don't let go until rings are exchanged. 522 00:42:54,696 --> 00:42:57,114 D-Don't talk to me about rings. 523 00:42:57,115 --> 00:43:01,118 - Carl! - Not now, Tony. Not now. 524 00:43:01,119 --> 00:43:03,537 I'll talk to you tomorrow morning about that singles assignment. 525 00:43:03,538 --> 00:43:08,084 - I got problems now. - Eh. I don't know what to do with that. 526 00:43:08,085 --> 00:43:10,002 Is there any other way we can break Helen's spell? 527 00:43:10,003 --> 00:43:12,505 Yeah. There is one way. 528 00:43:12,506 --> 00:43:14,715 - Kolchak! - Not now, Tony. 529 00:43:14,716 --> 00:43:18,762 - Now, Carl, please! - Please? 530 00:43:21,890 --> 00:43:24,058 Tony? 531 00:43:24,059 --> 00:43:26,394 - Tony, are you all right? Where are you? - Over here. 532 00:43:28,939 --> 00:43:32,567 - What are you doing there? - Help me up, will you? 533 00:43:32,609 --> 00:43:35,778 Tony, you called me in here to show me how you practice your yoga? 534 00:43:35,779 --> 00:43:37,446 Carl, help me get up! 535 00:43:37,447 --> 00:43:41,576 Why don't you start with a beginner's position, something simple? 536 00:43:41,618 --> 00:43:45,997 - This is the beginner's position! - Oh. Here. 537 00:43:47,958 --> 00:43:50,961 - I'm sorry about that, Tony. - Here, try this hand. 538 00:43:52,504 --> 00:43:54,338 - What do you got on your hand? - Mayonnaise. 539 00:43:54,339 --> 00:43:56,674 - Mayonnaise? - Yeah. 540 00:43:56,675 --> 00:43:59,760 - Look at that. They left work with all the lights on. - All right. What's the story? 541 00:43:59,761 --> 00:44:02,888 Carl, did I hear you say you're gonna discuss the singles feature tomorrow? 542 00:44:02,889 --> 00:44:04,617 - Yeah, tomorrow. Yeah. - Tomorrow is Friday. 543 00:44:04,641 --> 00:44:06,600 That's when it's due in New York. 544 00:44:06,601 --> 00:44:08,811 Well, the story is all finished. 545 00:44:08,812 --> 00:44:11,814 It just needs a little polishing in the morning, and I'll send it right off. Come on, Kaz. 546 00:44:11,815 --> 00:44:14,441 - Well, the priests were very powerful. - Uh-huh. 547 00:44:14,442 --> 00:44:17,862 Their enemies had to destroy the temple in order to make them powerless. 548 00:44:17,863 --> 00:44:20,489 - Destroy the temple. - Do you mind if I read the copy? 549 00:44:20,490 --> 00:44:22,449 After all, I am the bureau chief. 550 00:44:22,450 --> 00:44:24,535 Yes, absolutely, Tony. Absolutely. 551 00:44:24,536 --> 00:44:26,912 Tomorrow morning, first thing, I'll spitball a few ideas at you. 552 00:44:26,913 --> 00:44:30,124 Spitballing a few ideas is when you start a feature, not when you're polishing it. 553 00:44:30,125 --> 00:44:32,627 No, that's the way I work. I spit and polish at the same time. 554 00:44:32,669 --> 00:44:34,920 - Thanks, Kaz. I owe you. - Hey! 555 00:44:34,921 --> 00:44:37,464 I didn't say that destroying the temple was gonna work. 556 00:44:37,465 --> 00:44:39,634 Destroy the temple? Destroy what temple? 557 00:44:39,676 --> 00:44:41,802 Kolchak, come back here! 558 00:44:41,803 --> 00:44:43,929 What temple are you gonna destroy? 559 00:44:43,930 --> 00:44:48,934 Kolchak! What... What temple is he gonna destroy? 560 00:44:48,935 --> 00:44:51,771 What is he gonna... Hey, who are you? 561 00:47:00,775 --> 00:47:03,902 That's pretty strenuous exercise for a man your age, isn't it? 562 00:47:03,903 --> 00:47:06,947 It's pretty strenuous exercise for a man any age. 563 00:47:06,948 --> 00:47:11,327 You've ruined some very expensive statues. Museum quality. 564 00:47:11,328 --> 00:47:14,496 - And what did it get you? - Well, your temple's ruined. 565 00:47:14,497 --> 00:47:17,333 According to Kaz, Hecate ought to be destroying you about now. 566 00:47:17,334 --> 00:47:20,002 I don't think you're qualified to speak for Hecate. 567 00:47:20,003 --> 00:47:22,004 It's you she'll destroy. 568 00:47:22,005 --> 00:47:24,549 You had the stupidity to put on that ring. 569 00:47:25,967 --> 00:47:28,719 Imagine the feeling when your heart ages decades... 570 00:47:28,720 --> 00:47:31,055 in a matter of seconds... 571 00:47:31,056 --> 00:47:33,808 and finally jams up like an old clock. 572 00:47:33,850 --> 00:47:37,978 Well, how can Hecate accept me? 573 00:47:37,979 --> 00:47:40,898 I mean, I'm not a perfect sacrifice. Far from it. 574 00:47:40,899 --> 00:47:44,402 As I said before, I don't think you're qualified to speak for the gods. 575 00:47:55,747 --> 00:47:59,708 As a matter of fact, I'm not the first imperfect offering you've made. 576 00:47:59,709 --> 00:48:03,670 Did you know that William Cubby wore this? It's a glass eye. 577 00:48:03,671 --> 00:48:06,840 - You're lying. - No. 578 00:48:06,841 --> 00:48:10,386 No, I'm not lying, but I think Willy Cubby was. 579 00:48:10,387 --> 00:48:13,389 See, he didn't say anything to you at all, huh? 580 00:48:13,390 --> 00:48:16,184 - Ha-ha! - You made fools of the gods! 581 00:48:28,613 --> 00:48:31,741 Hecate! Hecate! 582 00:49:06,234 --> 00:49:09,069 I took some pictures, but it seemed pointless. 583 00:49:09,070 --> 00:49:14,408 The destruction of the room would be labeled vandalism or a faulty sprinkler system. 584 00:49:14,409 --> 00:49:18,370 I don't need any photographs of Helen. 585 00:49:18,371 --> 00:49:21,915 You see, she would always be as she always was... 586 00:49:21,916 --> 00:49:25,128 Cold and beautiful and unchanging. 587 00:49:26,754 --> 00:49:29,715 Uh... Oh, as a postscript, I offer this bit of advice. 588 00:49:29,716 --> 00:49:34,428 Should you ever find a ring, no matter how pretty or valuable, 589 00:49:34,429 --> 00:49:37,390 consider well before you slip it on your finger. 590 00:49:39,476 --> 00:49:41,352 You may never get it off again.